Rush Answers Barney Frank

Most of us would agree that this health care "debate" has gotten too convoluted, too ugly. Well, leave it up to Limbaugh to pepper the melee with his own touch of class--by adding homophobia to the mix.




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Jabba the Rush

Here, I thought you might like this.


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Rush Limbaugh on Black Men

With his recent attacks on President Obama and the head of the Republican Party, Michael Steele, people are once again openly questioning whether or not conservative radio talk show host, Rush Limbaugh, is indeed a racist. Personally, I don't know what's wrong with these people. I mean, Rush is a true patriot, an American hero, who only speaks the truth to save his country from sure destruction. It personally fills me with nothing but joy to see Rush take his rightful place as the head of the GOP. No one deserves it more.

And, if you really and truly believe that Rush is racist?! (how dare! you?!!!) just look at all the great things he's had to say about the black man over the years:


On Barack Obama

"I hope he fails."










On Michael Steele

"Why are you running the Republican Party?"










On Donovan McNabb

"Sorry to say this, I don't think he's been that good from the get-go. I think what we've had here is a little social concern in the NFL. The media has been very desirous that a black quarterback do well. There is a little hope invested in McNabb, and he got a lot of credit for the performance of this team that he didn't deserve. The defense carried this team."



On Colin Powell

"Secretary Powell says his endorsement is not about race. OK, fine. I am now researching his past endorsements to see if I can find all the inexperienced, very liberal, white candidates he has endorsed. I'll let you know what I come up with."







On Jesse Jackson

"Have you ever noticed how all composite pictures of wanted criminals resemble Jesse Jackson?"











On MLK

"You know who deserves a posthumous Medal of Honor? James Earl Ray [MLK's assassin]. We miss you, James. Godspeed."










On Slavery

"I mean, let’s face it, we didn’t have slavery in this country for over 100 years because it was a bad thing. Quite the opposite: slavery built the South. I’m not saying we should bring it back; I’m just saying it had its merits. For one thing, the streets were safer after dark."







On an Assumed Black Caller

"Take that bone out of your nose and call me again."











On His Dealer, Datavius Markell Washington

"That was my nigga, right there! He was always on time!"







See, he loved Brother Markell. I think all of you racist, race-baiters need to just shut the hell up! After all, who would you rather have lead the Republican Party in these times of trouble?

I have a feeling Rush is going to lead them, feverishly goose-stepping into the dustbin of history.

I say you give the man a chance.

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Protect Your Jindaltalia

Just a mere 48 hours ago, you were the Golden Child, the "rising star in the Republican Party," you, Piyush "Bobby" Jindal, were the cock on the walk.

Then you gave that speech and immediately got your balls handed to you.

You left Rachel Maddow impotent:



But everyone else was ready, scalpel in hand.

Dr. Charles Krauthammer, inventor of the "crack baby," said you "didn't have a chance."

Juan Williams called you "childish" and "amateurish".

David Brooks declared your response a "disaster":



Andy Borowitz thanked you for "the gift of laughter."

Andrew Sullivan said you reminded him of Kenneth the Page from 30 Rock. There's this YouTube mash-up saying you are Kenneth the Page from 30 Rock.



Of course, now Kenneth the Page from 30 Rock wants a piece of you, going on Jimmy Fallon, saying you're nothing like him.

Me? I'm more in line with Karen Dalton-Beninato, who thinks you more closely resemble Tim Calhoun.



In the blogosphere, Busted Knuckles over at Ornery Bastard absolutely toasted you over your volcano monitoring dig. While Jon Swift had us laughing raucously over the stench of your burnt flesh.

Folks are clowning you for naming yourself after that lovable, youngest brother from The Brady Bunch. I mean, damn, he was lovable.

Demonizing you because you saved a dear friend with an exorcism. Hell, Sarah Palin had a witch doctor just pray over her. You were being pro-active!

I've even seen some people call you a "self-loathing Indian." Bobby, how can they say that about you? How, Bobby? Jesus, Mary, and Joseph! How?!

But don't you listen to them, Bobby. Ignore those slings and arrows. Sure, they scored a direct hit, and now the family jewels are rolling around on the floor ready to be stomped to oblivion by that dastardly liberal media. Wait? What? Krauthammer, Brooks, and Sullivan are all Conservatives? What about Juan Williams? He's a liberal. Could've fooled me. And what was that? Even Laura Ingraham's aimed her stilettos at your stuff? She wasn't the one who said you "walked out like an earnest dork," was she? Or that "he seemed to have somehow figured out a way to speak too quickly and too slow at the same time." No? That was Jim Geraghty. Good, I was worried.

As I said, don't you worry about all those haters, Bobby. Don't you worry about that horrible speech, those flat jokes ("Instead of monitoring volcanoes, what Congress should be monitoring is the eruption of spending in Washington, D.C."--you really should fire your speech writers), ignore those nads of yours skittering across the floor.

After all, the good Nurse Ratched, I mean, Michelle Malkin, is there for you, providing the succor she never would've given the interned Japanese. She'll scoop those bad boys up for you, put them on ice. All you have to do is take some of that stimulus money (we know you're keeping most of that "irresponsible" money, anyway), and go to Dr. "Feelgood" Limbaugh. He'll stitch you up real nice for 2012. And think of the drugs, Bobby! Think of the drugs.



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Are We Done Yet?

Look, Massa President, you tried. You visited them, you dined with their pundits, dribbled with their Court. You had them over for the Super Bowl. You traded more jobs for tax cuts and only got three votes for your troubles. Face it, you've reached across the aisle and came back with a nub.

And now this? Judd Gregg withdraws his nomination for Secretary of Commerce over ... what was that again? Oh yeah. "Irresolvable conflicts." Riiiight. You don't have to look much further than the picture above to tell you where your differences really lie.

Let's face it. The Republicans are hoping that you fail. They are doing everything within their powers to see that you do. They're clicking their shoes three times, they're crossing their fingers, they're gulping gallons of bitch's brew, they're shoving pins in their little Sambo dolls. They will do what ... ev ... er it takes to see you fall on your face.

They're hoping that your failure will gain them seats in '10. They don't give a shit about the crisis this nation faces. They don't want to face up to the responsibilities they have as our elected officials. All they want to do is hate-n-holler.

Sure, they may have voted Steele in to head their party, but Rush is their leader now. And that pill-poppin' pork barrel would shank you in a Dittohead second. "I hope he fails." Does that sound bipartisan to you, black man? No, that's a major "Fuck you" to the Leader of the Free World. So, I say, "Fuck 'em."

Fuck all this "bipartisan" bullshit. It's like you're air-waltzing while your partner's off screwing the water boy. You don't need 'em. You're the star quarterback. Now, go win this game, run up the score on their scrub asses, and bang the head cheerleader!
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